It causes me nothing but pain being with you
Yet walking out of your life doesn’t still sit well with me.
I dare not call this love cause love I believe doesn’t cause this much damage.
I’m caught between leaving for my own mental and emotional health and sticking with you for the fun & pleasure. Tried leaving but my already damaged heart keeps pulling me back to you.
Deep down I know I’m supposed to forget what I feel and go for what I deserve.
Funny how the unhealthy emotional attachment between us tends to be so strong.
I lost myself trying to fix you, now I’m as damaged as you are and I’ve forgotten how having a good thing feels.
So difficult differentiating between a genuine ship (relationship, friendship e.t.c) from a toxic one.
Used to being hurt that not getting hurt makes me doubt if a thing is right for me.
Now I can’t even tell if I’m the toxic one or if you still are.
The only thing I am sure of is that I am damaged.
Toxic & manipulative people are so good at purposefully confusing you, they are skilled liars and great actors. You unconsciously find yourself depending on their opinions and doubting yours, they always end up leaving you drained and emotionally wiped out. Then you begin to make excuses for them, you begin to believe and internalize the lies they feed you and in turn affect how you view yourself and your worth.
I want you to ask yourself this question; Is this what I really deserve? Your response I believe is enough to push you into taking a step out. I will be stating few ways to help get out of toxic ships.
1)Accept that the ship is toxic.
2)Realise you deserve healthy love.
3)Remember who you are.
4)cut off every form of communication and remember it won’t be easy.
5)Fill the void and surround yourself with positivity.
I believe these steps would be of great help. Thanks for reading through, it is an honor having you here❤️ do well to like, subscribe, share, and also drop a comment 🥺 Thank you so much 🙏🥰